unforgettable

i have many kindly friends.. and they're very lovely..
but im always make them sad.

3 years ago i have my special teacher
but at last, i made she's very dissapointed about me

2 years ago, me and my best friend,
did a some fooled things.. *it's criminal.. haha
and im suddenly know that's
everything's is change now.

for some reason, im tried to doing my best,
but for somehow too, it's ever failed.
it's happen for every life's humanity
but, i hate it..

im very missed my junior high school life..
when im feel my life is very engrossed
but is too late,
im failed to make my happy ending.
u know what..
is no need for regrettable against.
and for the last chanced,
i cant see all my best friend
i remembered, they're keep tried
to invite me of our last meeting
and im ignored.
it's okay..
is better to they're goes without me.

and im ever feel
it's very sucks to know,
im late for one step for somethings.
and the other's can got what i wanted.
and im must let it go..
i'm always can get better than it.

im always strong compared other people.
but they're dont know,
im more hurt then they're feel..
though~
it's visible, in my eyes..
they're can see and feel my painful.
but they're never conscious..

im always make all people who
loved me is very hurt and anggry..
and they're go away..
it's my hobbies..
no, i dont think so..
i just need to recognize about my self..
please understand dear.
but if cannot, it's okay, well i know
im very annoyed to fickle
for some moment.. haha

but.. there's always one my best friend
who receive me, where ever my condition..
she's loved me.. and im preety sure
"she's the one.."
even thought i can't be a perfect for her.
im always told her, "forget me, im worst"
and she's said: "no, i cannot..you're best part of my life"
im realized.
whenever she's will forgeting me someday,
im happy too happy ever meet her,
thanks to my God..

for me..
my life is very worthy..
even though people said
im strange, weak, ugly,
evil, aroggant,
im never afraid..

it's my own life,
my journey and my destination.

for some people
who trusted me for all this time..
all of you're the best.
and i believed..
u will never ever be changed.
forgive me,
im not perfect.. but i love u

back to my boring school..
spent my time for a stressful..
wish me luck :)
 

~ the flowing and darkMoonlight~

yoo!

hello there's
welcome to house of art.. *he?
<-- this pict made with oil colour
cant u believed that?? now i can drawing on the canvas
it's exciting!! yuhuuuu~
but.. it's not finish yet.
there's many a blank part.
it's little bit yellow right? hoho..
because my camera effects.. i need to buy SLR >w<
*just speak.. thought
i wonder, im still have to learn many skill about coloring..
im not pro u know.. XDD

and if the pict is ready..
i'll upload it against.. see later yap

trouble sensitive part II

hello every body.. !!
how are u all?
long time no see texted my blog..
well, i'll tell you, little my experience about "Betrayed"
ahhhh, there's not strange for me' huh?
so.. it's told me about my best friend.. (trouble sensitive part I)
it's like the continued.. haha

u know,.. yesterday ago~
i got my phone rang
and then im pick up my phone
and said :"hello?"
she's right over there and smiling..
"hello.. how are u babe?"
"not fine at all.. im hate school *as always.. " #laugh
"same with me.. im just.."
"yeap?"
she's began a cried
"im alone in school.. and im miss u dear " *sniff
im standing silent for a while
(how came?) i think~
im ask :"what happen with you? how's your boy friend?"
she's said : "no.. he is cant do anythings.. and he's jealous of me, if
                  someone boy near or made a joke with me"
"i see,, he's possessive right?"
"Right, am i must to breakup with him? he's different now."
"dont do that.. be patient now, someday he'll understand, are you sure?"
"no, im wait for the appropriate timming to breakup him. i cant hold on againt's"
"and all friends ?"  
"yeah, something happen like that.. all my friends it's not same like you,
dont u believed? they're whispering front of me.. as if i cannot know they're
secret..it's annoying, what's they're means?"
"it's okay.. they're eternally like that. *of course because they're my rivals too
in junior high school. (same school with her and them) cause they're not moving at school
"i dont know,.. i hate them." #sigh
"me too. but dont worry about that.. " im tried to calm her

(and over while.. we're did a talking..
until her feelings better)

"im always wanted to meet you babe againts like as before we're in the same school.
how about mall? "
"sounds great! but cant, on this week.. many test, home work,and others.. it's fuck" ^^
"haha.. how about next saturday? i'll cancel my meetings with my other school friends"
"hey hey.. dont be like that"
"it's okay.. im veryy veryy wanted to meeet u~ "
(im smile.. well.. im feel like back to junior high school life")

on next friday~
but something always happen..
(got my phone rang against)
pick up:
"hello dear? how about our meetings?"
"err.. sorry babe, but i cant, im must going with my other friends school..
whereas i'm wants to go with you.." # exasperation
"haha it's okay.. dont worry. have fun right there's.." * i think it's no problem,
because she's made the first meeting with them before made it with me,
it's direspecful if she's canceled it.

after that..day by days no communication between us.
wow.. because im see now, she's got her feel's right back
no breakup with her boyfriend and more intimate.
no ask me to go with her againts
no call /chat with me againts
no caring, no news, no best friend

GOOD TO SEE U OKAY !!!
forever and ever dont looking at me if u're got your trouble again..

u're like a princess, every thing's u need is there for you.
u're have a happy life..u're take all the things that i wanted ago~
but im not.. im single fighter.. no need others
cause im not like you.. no awareness

and now. our life is never same.
back to my super boring's life
school,
homework,
test..

my consolation just to slept over the night
it's cozy.